We did it. After yet another fight, after yet another day without interacting with each other like a husband and wife, we decided to truly quit EverQuest. Right when the decision was made, we logged on to our accounts and told the guild we were leaving. We gave all our money and equipment to the guild. We were going to delete our characters, but the guild wanted to keep them. So we gave Kibek our station names and passwords and asked him to change the passwords so we couldn’t log on. Then, after a tearful goodbye to the guildies, we logged off, uninstalled the game, and cancelled our accounts.

It was like coming out into the sunlight after being in a dark tunnel for a very long time. I was so relieved. Yesterday evening, when we were driving around and I was commenting on how pretty the sunset and sky was and how lovely the wind felt, Matt said that I had a different presence about me the last couple of days. He said I was happier and I am. We haven’t been outside in so long. We haven’t done anything except play EverQuest in so long.

I am happier. I’m a lot happier.

I am trying to get the EQ monkey off my back. It isn’t easy for several reasons:

1) I enjoy the game;

2) My husband enjoys the game;

3) My guildmates encourage me not to quit.

But I just have… I just have to. My life is flying by me, each second passing unnoticed… unlived. I spend my time trying to get level 56 so I can have 96% rezz.

So I quit EverQuest. I hope I can stay off it. I don’t think my husband realizes how important this is to me. I want to change. I feel like I haven’t been experiencing life. And I want to change.